Tuesday 5: Big important things!

It has been a couple weeks since I last posted, so I guess I should do a little bit of writing. It's that Tuesday 5 time again!

1. I am still going through a bit of the winter blues. I don't mind winter, but I would prefer to get a boatload of snow at least once this year! The one time we were initially projected to get a huge snowstorm, it all went north of us and we got nothing but a trace. Boo. I miss the snow. I love being out in it, the look of the pristine lawn of snow before anyone walks on it, and the way a city shuts down in silent reverie. It is so lovely. Come back snow, I miss you!

2. So my stepdaughter graduates 8th grade this year and she goes to school in a small town, as she mainly resides with her mother. We went to an 8th grade parents' meeting a week or two ago to go over graduation, the 8th grade dance, some fundraisers, and the 8th grade trip to an amusement park.  The kids want their dance's theme to be Royal Ball and they are going to wear formals. Are you kidding me?! It's 8th grade! Not only that, but the parents are talking about spending gobs of money on decorations and a DJ. They even made statements like "This is my child's 8th grade dance, of course we are going big! The school isn't paying for it, so we can do what we want!" Okay, I understand that this is a milestone in a child's life, but it isn't high school. Plus, the K-12 is all in the same cluster of buildings, so they aren't even physically moving anywhere. Back in my day, (yes, I am legitimately using that phrase) the only decorations we had were a few streamers and balloons on the refreshment table and we wore regular dresses, nothing fancy to our dance. Oh, and THEN, they started talking about how maybe they should do a glow in the dark theme and have the kids' hands get painted with it so they could see who got too handsy on the dance floor *tee hee* Oh isn't it so funny to sexualize our 13 year olds?! *wink wink* It's nothing we didn't do back then. Except uh, no, we didn't do that. Anyone who had "boyfriends" in junior high went to the movies and held hands and maybe kissed a few times, but I KNOW our parents for the most part encouraged modesty and self-respect. Ugh, sorry for the tangent, but that really disgusted me. Am I a prude?

3.  Today is Fat Tuesday y'all! Mardi Gras! I am thinking about what to do for Lent this year. I am sure you are all supremely interested, right? Well, I am thinking of abstaining from all pop and alcohol this year and adding some prayerful activity. I am terrible about following through on the prayer stuff though, so I am going to start small and maybe do a rosary once a week and maybe 2 religious books over the course of 40 days. What are you doing? Any more, simple ideas for me?

4.  Is there anything quite as rage-inducing or perhaps frustrating as the election cycle in the U.S.? I think you are hard-pressed to find something worse in that respect. If the super mysoginistic, and bankruptcy-loving Trump wins the nomination, this country is far more selfish than I originally thought. It's sad how successful he is in using fear and loathing to his advantage and disguising it as frankness.

5. Speaking of loathsome politics, Hillary Clinton is pretty despicable as well. So much history of shady dealings and outright lying and basically saying anything anyone wants to hear just to garner votes. The worst part is that Gloria Steinem, someone who considers herself a groundbreaking feminist, basically said the reason young women (under 45, that's me!) are flocking to Bernie Sanders is because all the boys like Sanders. Whaaaa?!?! So women like Bernie because we are too stupid to think about issues and just go where the cute boys are. Wow. Just wow. Not to be outdone, Madeline Frickin' Albright stated her "jokey" motto that she has said (according to her) many times in the past. "There's a special place in hell for women who don't support other women." So now I am supposed to vote for Hillary because she and I share the same gender?! How is that not the very opposite of what feminism stands for? It's truly appalling that women are actually considering her.

I know, I know, people have very different ideas of what they want a president to be like. It's great that there is so much attention focused on electing our next leader. However, I would encourage everyone to do some digging and not just vote for someone for superficial reasons. This is important and yes, your vote does mean something. It's too bad we don't take up a grass roots movement for an intelligent person that's not worth tens of millions of dollars or more!

Thanks for reading and have a great week!

Tuesday 5: The Force Awakens and so does my Soapbox

1. Yes, we did see Star Wars opening night, but I really want to see it again. Rick and I both had New Year's Day off, so I was going to watch it again while he and my SD Ashley watched Krampus. We went to the 4pm showing. I did not purchase tickets ahead of time. It was sold out again, y'all! 2 weeks after the release and still selling out. Wow. That's quite a feat. For the record, while I love the new characters and the *SPOILER* light saber battle in the snow was amazing, I really didn't like the way they jammed it down my throat that this film was going to be like the OT (original trilogy for you normal folk) and definitely not like the prequels. I get it, I get it. People despised the prequels. Yes, I don't like them nearly as much as the OT, but TFA was TOO self-referential. I was actually kind of glad *SPOILER* that not all of the OT characters will be in the next ones. Focus on Rey and give me a sweet back story for Poe Dameron and I will love you forever JJ!

2.  So, instead of watching Star Wars like I wanted, I ended up seeing Sisters, with Tina Fey and Amy Poehler.  It was hysterical and there were several spots I laughed 'til I nearly cried. Yes, it's raunchy. Yes, it's a party movie, but it is a party movie for 40 year olds! Plus, it has awesome cameos by lots of funny people, including Maya Rudolph, Kate McKinnon, Bobby Moynihan, John Leguizamo, Rachel Dratch, and Samantha Bee. All hilarious! Reviews are divided, but what bothers me is that the biggest complaint from the naysayers is that it isn't cerebral enough. That's right, apparently Tina Fey and Amy Poehler can only do comedies that are smart, like Parks and Rec. or 30 Rock. Yes, they are smart women, but they are entitled to cut loose every once in a while. Seth Rogen and James Franco aren't the only ones allowed to do those types of movies. They have enough comedy cred to do whatever the heck they wanna do! Tina Fey as a writer was one of the best SNL staff writers of all time! This feels a little personal to me, because a lot of those people doing reviews make it seem like smart women over 40 can only be certain things. They can't be raunchy without being sluts. They can't be sexual without being trashy sluts. They can't act silly without being stupid, trashy sluts. Look, I am not saying we should advocate binge drinking and drugs as a regular lifestyle. I am merely saying that women can portray those roles for the purpose of a funny movie without degrading women by that portrayal. I think Fey and Poehler do a good job of that. Yes, these women are a mess, but they aren't setting feminism back through these characters. What does set it back though, is when reviewers make it seem like Fey and Poehler MUST portray only cerebral funny roles in order to make a statement. Sometimes there is no statement. Sometimes it's just frickin' funny.

3. Oh my, that soapbox got a bit lofty, didn't it? Let me bring it back down. Speaking of statements, I made one this weekend when I was crowned CHAMPION of my Fantasy Football league. I am the only female in a league of 10 players, comprised of my husband, my brother, and their coworkers. This group includes 2 guys making a career out of sports broadcasting and a couple others who have been in leagues for years! I am so proud of myself, as my first year in the league was last year and I ended up in the middle of the pack then. I studied players quite a bit and I feel like I managed my team pretty well for a relative newbie. If you're a nerd who likes numbers, FF may be for you. I played my brother in the championship and won $225. Now to find something(s) fun to spend it on. I foresee a few hours on Etsy!

4.  I have been listening to my mp3 at work a lot lately. I ended up setting it to play every soon it (391) in alphabetical order. What a hodge podge that is! Alt. Rock, Beatles, Johnny Cash, 90s country, Les Mis, Edith Piaf, among others. Music is integral to the wellbeing of my soul. That is not an overstatement. Music feeds me spiritually. I have done music-related posts on here before. Seek them out, read them, and let me know the one current song you could listen to on loop. One current, one old, one hymn...how's that? I am so looking forward to your answers! For the record, mine are: nothing new, so I will say a new-ish one, The Cave by Mumford and Sons. Old one would be: Folsom Prison Blues. Hymn? Hmmm. I actually love the Gloria (Glory to God in the Highest) in the Catholic mass. I hum it a lot, in the middle of the week.

5. Finally, my husband just got called out for work, so it looks like I am by myself tonight. Dig in to The Martian or a book on mercy? Decisions, decisions.

Have a great week everyone and thanks for reading and sharing!

Tuesday 5: I'm still alive!

Hey lovely readers!  All of you that managed to stick around after I have alienated you for the last several months.  I'm sorry, y'all.  I'm really sorry, but I have found myself appallingly uninteresting lately and instead of subjecting you to my dull self, I have refrained from writing full stop.  I guess I should at least try to get back up on that horse, but my fat ass is gonna have a hard time lifting itself up into the saddle.

We'll start out nice and slow, with a little Tuesday 5 to let you know I am, in fact, still here.  No in memoriam for me, at least, not yet.

I'm still a dullard, but I'm YOUR dullard on duty, got that?  *snicker*  Duty.

Anyway, here we go!

1)  So, I finally watched Trainwreck last week and I have to say, I had probably one of the most improbable reactions to it.  I cried.  A lot.  Like really, a lot, to the point where my husband asked me if I was crying in a voice that sounded like he was really weirded out by it.  I was weirded out by it.  I'm still not fully sure why I was crying, but I think it may have had something to do with a conversation Amy had with the good doctor toward the end when she was admitting her vulnerability.  Full on tears flowing.  I'd like to say that was out of character for me, but well, it's not.

2)  I am not a touchy feely, super emotionally in touch person.  I close myself off a lot and try to project a slightly intimidating exterior, if only to save myself from questions.  However, I cry at a lot of things.  I cry at commercials, I cry at Youtube videos of dogs being reunited with their military service family, I cry at that scene in Anne of Avonlea when Anne Shirley turns down the rich dude.  I cry at a lot of important things too, though.  I don't know that I've cried harder at a movie than I did while watching Hotel Rwanda.  It's a true story, people!  TRUE.  STORY.  Full on sobbing for half an hour after it was over.  Watch with caution.  Someone at work asked me why I baked so many damn Christmas goodies this year and I told them it was to fill a small void in my cold, cold heart.  I guess what I'm saying is that I feel big emotions in GIGANTIC ways and even though I am a hardass sometimes, it's not without some deep thinking and some compassion that I make certain decisions.

3)  I received an adult coloring book in my stocking this year.  I am excited, because I haven't just sat and colored in years.  My daughter is going to lend me her gel pens for use and I cannot wait to try it out!  I was the OCD kid that outlined the picture, inside each separately lined area before coloring in the middle.  I actually won a contest at Easter when I was 6 through a local Wal-Mart because my picture was the one they chose as the best colored.  I won a plastic wheelbarrow that was chock full of Easter candy and a huge fluffy pink bunny.  We broke the wheelbarrow that same night, pushing each other full speed around the dining room.  Whoops.

4)  Currently reading a book called The Weird Sisters by Eleanor Brown and cultivating a lot of deep thinking during it as well.  The sisters are all named after Shakespearean heroines and all come back to their parents' home when they find out their mother is ill.  I am engrossed.  That is what I will be doing as soon I post this sucker up.  The book is outstanding so far and the sisters all read constantly.  It makes me want to gather up a thousand books and get lost in the words.  Reading is the bees' knees y'all.  Bee's knees?  Eh, one or all of the bees may be thrilled.

5)  My husband and I are two big nerds who saw Star Wars VII:  The Force Awakens on opening night Friday (not to be confused with premiere night Thursday).  We really, really enjoyed it and I have a lot of questions now.  Love the new characters and I am excited with the way it's headed.  Our priest gave a homily that included Star Wars that gave us some insight into our viewing.  He said that George Lucas is Buddhist or admires the tenets of Buddhism and that one of the central beliefs is that everything is cyclical.  That helped me absorb a bit more of the story.  I do have several nits to pick over the movie, but overall was satisfied.

How about all of you?  How have you been since I took my mini-break?  I hope everyone has had a spectacular holiday season and are ready to be mentally refreshed in the New Year.  I know 2016 will keep me on my toes.  Thanks for reading and I appreciate any time you share this page with friends.

Tuesday Random 5: Debbie Downer edition

1.  So, this one's depressing. I had to euthanize my dog, Bear, Monday morning. He hurt himself Thursday and I took him to the vet Friday night. They diagnosed him with osteosarcoma  (bone cancer) that metastasized to his lungs and bowel.  There wasn't much they could do, so we decided to bring him home for the weekend, spoil him, and let him go.   I already miss that loveable dude so much. It is weird not to see him. He was a beautiful dog, half German Shepherd, half retriever, and he loved kids. He used to sneak out of the gate and run off over night. At first, I was so worried something would happen to him, but every single time, he would be sitting on our porch the next morning. He always knew to come back home.

2. I have had high anxiety days, today and yesterday. At mass tonight, I really thought I was going to pass out.  Last night, I made Rick keep his arm around me all night. I slept like shit and I feel kind of depressed. Please say a special prayer for me, if you do that kind of thing. I think it will be another long night tonight.

3.  I am officially the office Grinch. I always kind of have been, but it was solidified today. My coworker who sits right next to me put up lights outside of her cubicle and someone suggested that they string lights all down the aisle. I politely suggested they skip over mine. I got a weird look from my supervisor.  I am sorry, but my work is not my life and I am not going to make it all cozy, because it is not the be all end all. I just want to do my job and go home.  *sigh*

4.  I received an email from a case worker in one of the local offices today that convinced me she is barely literate. It was truly appalling. Who sends an email full of shorthand and no capitalization or evidence of grammar to a coworker? So bizarre.

5.  I know it is the depression and anxiety, but I just want to sleep right now and it's not even 8:30. Yikes.

Have a better week friends.

Tuesday 5: Take me out to the ball game

In the midst of MLB Division series right now and finding I am quite enjoying the matchups so far this year. There are some great storylines going on this year, too.  Disclaimer:  I am a sports nut, particularly the NFL and MLB so if you aren't,  you may not love this one.

1. Watching the Cubs - Cards game 4 right now. By now, I am sure you have heard that Back to the Future predicted the Cubs win it all this year. How crazy is it that they are as close as they are to making a movie's sub sub subplot come true? I wouldn't mind another I-70 series, but I would love to see the Cubbies there instead. ETA: Cubs just won. WTG Cubs! Good luck in the NLCS!

2.  As you may have surmised, I am a fan of the Royals. And yes, I have been a fan since I was a kid and grew up watching their games on TV and listening to them on the radio. I really, really hope they make it back to the World Series, but we have a tough game ahead against the Astros.  It was so hard to just get occasional updates at work when the magical comeback occurred yesterday. I didn't wear my Royal blue shirt that day and so now I cannot wear it tomorrow.  I am that superstitious,  yes.

3.  As a fan of baseball, I hated Chase Utley's super late, super high, tackle/slide at Tejada in the Dodgers - Mets game this weekend. There is no need for that. Yes, he may not have intended for Tejada to be injured, but he did get injured. An apt analogy is that someone speeding 55 in a 20 MPH school zone may not intend to hurt someone, but driving recklessly can still get someone hurt.  For that reason, and the fact that the Dodgers are basically trying to buy a ring this year with all the dough they spent, I am hoping the Mets win their game tonight.

4.  Toronto, I don't know what to say. I liked you at one point, but then Josh Donaldson started acting like a petulant child and my give a shit button started shorting out. Fix that, cuz I truly like Tulowitzki and your city.

5.  Finally, I just have to say that I have followed baseball on and off forever and it really is such a great sport. I am not a fan of the emphasis on homer hitters and homerun-friendly ballparks, but I can understand it with this younger ADD generation.  I will never forget Kirk Gibson pumping his fist,  rounding third after hitting a homerun while injured, John Smoltz stealing home in one of the many 90s era Braves postseason appearances, or the shock and tragedy of the earthquake that hit before the 1989 Bay Area World Series. If you love it like I do, you really should visit Cooperstown. It's amazing. George Brett's pine tar bat is there, as are all the greats. If you can't make it there and live near KC, get down to the Negro Leagues Baseball Museum. It is nothing short of awe inspiring.

Baseball is in my blood and there's nothing to compare with the sound of the crack of the bat, the smell of peanuts and cotton candy, the taste of ice cold beer, the feel of a weathered glove, or the sight of a beautifully executed double play.  If you love it like I do, get out there and absorb it all. Root, root, root for the home team and enjoy the playoffs! Go Royals!

Tuesday 5: On Food, Hair, and Humans

1.  I was up way too early this morning, planning restaurant dishes in my head. Do I own a restaurant?  No. Am I a trained chef? No. But, if you need a sandwich called "The Homeland" that features Vienna sausage, homemade sauerkraut and a condiment that features mustard with some kick, you know where you can't get it! My imaginary restaurant that serves international cuisine.  (Including entremets for dessert. Different ones weekly!)

2.  We got a pretty good deal on a new TV for the office this week. Previously, we had an old CRT TV. In honor of the occasion, I dedicated myself to playing on the old PS2. Vice City, Gauntlet, and Ratchet and Clank are my favorites. Good times.

3.  I got my hair updated with some fall highlights. One of the colors is a deep brown with a red tone. In certain lighting, it looks kinda purpley. It makes me wanna dye my whole head that color. What do you think?

4.  I love fall food, but I am trying to stay away from a lot of it, because it usually has a lot of starchy stuff featured. What are your favorite fall recipes that are also good for you? I need some ideas that are tasty and everyone will enjoy.

5.  I cannot be the only one who has 0 interest in reality TV these days, am I?  I saw a promo for Little Women:  LA on the Lifetime network and it skeeved me out. I know these women are apparently okay with exploiting themselves,  but it's just so icky. If you want something worth reading and following, I recommend Humans of New York. He is currently featuring a series on refugees and it is heartbreaking and breathtaking and will help you to refocus on real humanity.  HONY is on Facebook and Instagram. Look at the world, and your fellow human beings, differently and with love and dignity, my friends.

Have a great week!

Guarding Hearts

I have been thinking a lot lately about marriage and divorce.  No, not for the reason you think!  I found out the other day that another neighbor of ours (#4) got divorced.  I also had a neighbor tell me a story about how a former friend of hers, who knew my neighbor no longer wanted to be friends with, tried to ingratiate herself with my neighbor's family and gave my neighbor's husband a lingering hug, but didn't say anything to my neighbor.

I have been ruminating on the topic a while because I was thinking about how all these micro-circumstances, micro-thoughts, micro degradation of morals can all lead to marriage failure.  I am not sure I'm going to be able to articulate this well, but I'm going to try.

What do I mean by micro degradation of morals?  Well, I sometimes peruse a website quite well known on the interwebs for mom blogs.  It also has a community forum and a confessional.  When I first happened upon this site, I read the confessional.  It was a lot of funny, heartfelt, and sometimes juicy snippets of others' lives.  Quite often, you have people that confess to lustful thoughts and actions and out of those, many of them are confessing to having affairs or wanting affairs.  I used to read them with a bit of an ego because I had a marriage I felt was very workable and very good.  We truly care for one another and put each other first and I never for a second thought about doing anything that these people were confessing.

However, after so many times of logging on and reading these, I noticed a change in my thinking.  I started thinking about how easy it must be to get away with these actions, because there are so many people confessing to them.  I also thought about how this must be something that a lot of people did because there are so many confessions talked about masturbating at work, watching porn, giving people handies or blowjobs because you needed something from them, and yes, having affairs, with neighbors, friends, bosses, and coworkers.  

I told my neighbor (the one with the ex-friend hitting on the hubby) that I felt like, even if you would never do those things, and you know your spouse would never do those things, that sometimes allowing your mind to start seeing those things as natural occurrences could lead to something harmful within your marriage.  Does that make sense now, when I talk about small things degrading our morals?  I'm not trying to sit on a high horse and say you must never have lustful thoughts.  I'm simply saying that for the safety and security of your marriage, sometimes it's best to just Not. Go. There.  

And yes, maybe not everyone is going to fall into those traps and certainly, there are a large faction of individuals who truly enjoy porn and sometimes use it with their significant other, who will undoubtedly testify that it hasn't hurt their marriage, but enhanced it.  Yes, maybe that is true.  Maybe you ARE able to have an open marriage or be swingers and it not affect your bond with your spouse. Great!  I would never advocate that, but I'm not you.  

What I AM saying is that circumstances can lead to outcomes we do not foresee.  When we place ourselves at the mercy of our wants, without boundaries, it can sometimes end badly.  And, when we allow ourselves the luxury of thinking it can't happen to us, it oftentimes does.

That little flirty text to a coworker one night because you are feeling neglected by your spouse can lead to more texting, perhaps with feelings developing over time and lunch dates and so on.  The idea that you are going to withhold intimacy from your spouse as revenge because they didn't do the dishes can lead to masturbating at work, which can lead to much more.  And yes, reading confessions about other people doing these things can lead to niggling thoughts about how easy it would be.  I should try it, just this once.  My spouse will never know.  

Look, I have an acquaintance whose wife left him for a door-to-door salesman.  Any time you let the guard on your marriage down, you have left the door open to doubt.

We should always be guarding our hearts and our minds from outside traffic.  No one wants to think their spouse would do this, so we better damn well make sure we are on our toes, too.  

I have since discontinued reading those same confessionals.  I couldn't allow myself to let weakness creep in.  I noticed that change and I stopped.  This may make some of you upset, thinking that I'm just doing the old fire and brimstone act and we're all going to hell spiel.  That's actually about the furthest thing from the actual truth.  I'm talking about this today because it is real.  These small wayward thoughts and individual self-satisfying actions can and have led to marriage failures.  I don't want that to happen to me.  I don't want that to happen to you.  If this makes you uncomfortable, good.  That was my intent.  It made me uncomfortable admitting to myself the reason I needed to stop reading the damn things.  I was hanging on every juicy dalliance.  

I care about you and I care about the health and strength of your marriages.  I hope I have made my point in a way that's not too officious.  Please, rant at me in the comments if you disagree.  I appreciate any and all feedback!  To steal a line from Red Green, "Remember, I'm pulling for you.  We're all in this together."

Tuesday 5...on a Tuesday?

So, have you heard of this thing called blogging?  I don't seem to be doing a very good job of it lately, but I've heard that when it's done consistently and well, it can be interesting.  Obviously, I haven't reached that point yet.

One more attempt at getting consistent is coming up!

1)  I have been crocheting a lot lately.  I went and bought some new hooks and a bunch of yarn last week and now I just need to set aside time in which to get all of my projects done.  I am really good at starting projects, not the best at finishing.  Here's hoping I can actually start finishing some of them and shipping them to my family and friends.  I have learned a lot of stitches already and have found that Google is a great help when I need a few tips and tricks.  There are a LOT of great crochet blogs out there.  By the way, apparently one of the most stolen items from our local library is a magazine titled Crochet World.  I guess crocheting and knitting really IS getting popular!

2)  Tonight was homemade fettuccine alfredo.  Well, the alfredo sauce was homemade, not the pasta.  It's a 20 minute delicious meal.  Not good for the waistline necessarily, but delicious nonetheless.  What's your favorite go-to quick and easy meal?

3)  I am excited for all the season premieres this week!  We've already watched the newest Big Bang Theory, but the new Modern Family is coming up tomorrow night!  I really hope they resolve the Haley-Andy plot and I hope it ends with them together!  Adam Devine is ADORABLE as Andy and Sarah Hyland is always great as Haley.  They are so cute together, even though I liked Dylan, too.  What are the shows you are excited for this season?

4)  So, I'm reading a book called "Trip of the Tongue" which explores certain enclaves of language throughout the United States.  She started with several Native American languages and talks about the extinction of a lot of these languages and how that happens, etc.  Anyhow, one of the places she visited was Forks, Washington.  Apparently, that is the setting for Twilight?  I don't know, never read 'em.  She was talking about how there is a HUGE tourism boom there because of the books and that they give tours of the town, even though the book is FICTION and none of those characters ever actually lived.  Yikes. That just makes me want to shake my head, but I guess it's similar to wanting to see the foundations of Tintagel Castle in England because according to legend, that is where King Arthur was conceived, so who am I to judge...well, maybe I still will a little. ;)

5)  I may have the house all to myself the majority of the weekend this upcoming weekend.  Rick has to work all weekend and it's Daden's off week and Ashley wants to stay at her mother's, because she has to redo her "real" baby school experiment because she gave it too many head tilts last time.  Oops.  So, now I'm thinking about all the things I want to do this weekend.  What's the one thing YOU would do if you had the entire weekend to yourself?

Have a great week everyone!

Belated 5: Acting with Compassion

In my small city, our city council was recently debating a law regarding "aggressive panhandling".  It would have outlawed panhandling in certain places and banned "aggressive" tactics like following an individual, continually asking, touching someone without consent, and intentionally blocking or impeding the free passage of an individual or vehicle.

These sound totally reasonable, except when you take into account that even the local police say these instances are practically nonexistent as it is.  You can usually see anywhere from 1 to 5 people sitting at intersections with signs in our city.  Oftentimes, it is single men, but every once in a while you see single women and the occasional couple.  I used to be the type that refused to give anything to a panhandler, except the occasional advice to seek out the mission in our town.  I heard those stories about the individuals who refused to take the food offered, instead asking for money and I thought, "Well, to heck with them.  They just want cash to abuse alcohol or drugs."  

However, over the years, I have asked myself the difference between myself and these individuals.  I had a job, a husband with a career, and a large network of supporting friends and family.  I've never known true hunger and I've damned well never had to drink rot gut vodka just to make myself forget my hunger and sleep through the night.  Who am I to set limits on my gifts? 

 I have prayed for many years to have a softer heart and to be more giving to others.  It's hard to be compassionate.  There are many different ways that we can act with compassion.  I have decided to make this Tuesday Wednesday 5 about compassion.

1.  Judge less.  

I know, I know, easier said than done, right?  It's a lot easier to look at and think about every way a person is doing it wrong or living their life in moral decrepitude or relying on addiction.  As I said above, I try very hard not to put MY limitations on other individuals.  I am not them.  Judgment of a person based on their color, creed, gender, religion, etc. is not only not helpful, but it usually has the opposite effect intended.  Maybe instead we should ignore those things and focus on the person.

2.  Open our hearts more.

I subtitled this one:  LOVE without ceasing.  In order to act with compassion, we need to look at that person and decide to love them.  We need to cast our negativity aside and open our hearts to helping them.  As Dr. King stated (and I paraphrase), dark cannot drive out dark, only light can do that.  Hate cannot drive out hate, only love can do that.

3.  Actively listen and (attempt to) understand individual struggles.

Some of us may never know what it's like to lose parents at a young age, to lose children, to be raped, or beaten, or ignored.  We may never know the realities of war or loss of limbs or bad health issues.  Those of us trying to practice compassion MUST take the time to ACTIVELY listen.  That does not mean listening and ignoring or nodding our heads throughout.  That means to engage that person and ask questions or give comfort while attempting to understand that person's struggles.  When we do that, we act with compassion and open the door for that person to realize they are important and loved.

4.  Do good works selflessly.

Acting with compassion sometimes means stepping up and helping out.  It can be as simple as direct eye contact and a smile, holding a door open, or picking up something that fell out of someone's purse or shopping cart.  Recently, my daughter and I were at Joann's Fabrics and a mother was there with an infant in a car seat in one cart, another cart piled with fabric, and a toddler.  The toddler started grabbing stickers off a hook on an end cap and dropping them on the floor.  The mother saw this and gently grabbed her daughter away.  I immediately nudged my daughter and she picked up every one of those sticker pages and hung them up, without question.  Doing good isn't always a grand gesture.  Doing them selflessly is important, because even though doing good works does foster good feelings and a sense of accomplishment, our main goal shouldn't be to boost ourselves, but to uplift others.  This is a great example of compassion in action.

5.  Speak directly and sensitively.

This one can be difficult to do as well.  Part of acting with compassion is being sensitive to the person you are talking with and actively listening to.  We must be sure that they hear and understand that we have taken their humanity into account.  Speaking directly is an act of compassion as well.  This means that we are trying to direct them to better choices while also realizing that they are adults who get to make the final decision.  

Do you have anything to add to this list?  Compassion is something that we need to foster in our youth and I feel it is sorely needed in today's world.  When we have refugees drowning while trying to flee murderous religious tyranny and LGBT individuals killing themselves at an ever increasing rate and people hating others based on their occupations, or color, or religion, we have a society lacking compassion and empathy.  Please, act with compassion, and encourage others to do the same.  LOVE (and pray) without ceasing.

Tuesday 5: Frustrations of a Step

I know what you're thinking.  You're thinking this is going to be your typical stepmother rant about their stepkids.  I want to assure you that is not the case.  Unlike what you may read every day in the confessionals on Scary Mommy, not every stepchild, stepparent relationship is full of enmity.

In fact, I would be willing to venture a guess that most people who end up as stepparents get along very well with their stepchildren.  For some reason though, we only ever hear the angry ones, perhaps because they are the loudest.

However, that doesn't mean that I don't have valid frustrations in regards to this relationship.  I do.  I have a lot of frustrations, but they don't have anything to do with the children.  It's more like what rends my heart with concern and heartache for my children.

Without further ado, my list of the top 5 frustrations stepparents face with their stepchildren.  (Okay, my perceived top 5.

Getting our geek on at the Houston Space Center, 2013

5.  I think most stepparents will willingly admit that the frustration they feel over the time they get with said stepkids is a frustration that occurs more often than not.  If we are the non-custodial parents, we have to plan months ahead of time for any vacations we may take with our children.  It never feels like enough.  I will never be able to spend enough time with my kids.  Whether we are playing games, going to the park or the library, or talking with them about their week(s), when it's time to take them back to their mothers', it hurts our hearts to see them go.  When my husband and I first started dating, his daughter was only 9 months old.  It has never gotten easier to give hugs and let go.  My stepson didn't become fully part of our lives until he was nearly 8.  (Long story short, his Mom lived in Cali for the first 7 1/2 years of his life and my husband couldn't move there, because he had his daughter here.)  We missed SO MUCH TIME with him.  When our interactions with our children are limited to Tuesday evenings and every other weekend, we miss out on a lot of fun stuff in between.  Which leads to another frustration...

Catching snowflakes at Grandma and Grandpa's

4.  Not all of us get to be the parents that greet our children every day after school.  I've never gotten to watch my children get on or off the school bus.  I've rarely gotten to help with their homework.  I've rarely gotten to go to their schools and help out.  The schools oftentimes don't even contact us when a major event is coming up and they need school snacks.  We are the 'other' parents.  We are the ones that they only have to contact when a bad behavior occurs.  Even then, we aren't the first ones to know.  It's very frustrating to be treated like an afterthought.  We love our children and would LOVE to be more involved, but it's difficult when I feel like I may be stepping on the mothers' toes.  I'm not trying to show off, I just want to show up!

3.  One of my biggest frustrations is the assumption that I'm not a 'real parent'.  I know many stepparents feel this way.  The first time I showed up with my husband to his son's parent-teacher conference, my stepson's mother was livid.  She proceeded to tell my husband later that I wasn't a 'real' parent, so what was I doing there?  Thankfully, my husband nipped that s*%$ in the bud and told her that I would be there, no matter what, whether she liked it or not.  When she still argued, he suggested setting up separate appointments.  Suddenly, she was totally willing to allow me there.  BUT, I better keep my mouth shut.  Even though I work in the state's social services, I was not allowed to voice an opinion on my stepson's welfare.  (If you know me, you know that didn't stop me!)  Stepparents are just as real as those who helped create those children.  And really, is it so BAD to want extra support for your children?  Why would you WANT your child's stepparent to have nothing to do with them?  Can you imagine the damage THAT would cause?

I bet several of my friends recognize this fountain!

2.  A frustrating thing for many parents and stepparents, is when the children express their desire to live with the other parent.  We went through this a few years ago with my stepdaughter.  She confided in me that she would love to live with her Dad and I, but she didn't want to leave her mother all alone.  Her mother was having a tough time, because my stepdaughter's grandmother was threatening to take her mother's eldest child away from her if she kept living with her then-boyfriend.  The grandmother had guardianship, because her mother had him when she was 16 and she gave her guardianship back then.  My stepdaughter was so afraid that her mother would be all alone.  Rick and I had several very deep conversations about this.  We desperately wanted her in our home.  Our home is not run down, she has her own room here, we have better schools near us, and well, we love her and would have loved to have her.  I told him though, that I thought it best if we allow her to guide us to a decision.  I knew how much it weighed on her heart to give voice to her fears.  I couldn't allow her to feel like she was abandoning her mother, so she stayed.  She still lives there, but our door is always open.  If you have loved a child, any child, you know how gut-wrenching of a decision that was.

1.  The number one frustration I have as a stepparent is wondering about the future for my children.  Unfortunately, the child support system in this country is severely broken.  They penalize the non-custodial parents to the point that they can't even save for their children.  My husband pays so much in child support that if it wasn't for my paycheck, he'd probably be living in his old dinky 900-square foot, 2-bedroom home.  The calculations they use are fairly ridiculous.  I worry often about whether the mothers are saving for their children's college.  We can't.  We can't even pay into my husband's retirement account.  I often think about how these children will afford college and beyond.  We have savings accounts for them, but the only thing that goes into it is a part of their allowances right now.  I also worry about the negative influences they may be around in the other homes.  Nothing inherently bad, but sometimes the bad habits are recognizable.  My stepchildren both have mothers that weren't very involved in their school at all.  Neither one of them graduated from a traditional 4-year college and neither of them really played sports or were in band, or any of that.  My stepdaughter has already quit softball, volleyball, and band.  All done surreptitiously, because she knew we would be upset.  Her mother was totally fine with it.  Just this past Sunday, I put her on blast for her choices.  I'm so worried that with no motivation or drive to do extracurricular activities, she will fail to get any decent scholarships.

South Carolina, 2014

Mainly, I worry about how our relationship will change as they grow, get into high school, graduate, and go on to their own families.  Have we done enough to show them we love them unconditionally?  Have we left enough of an impact that they will come back to visit us?  It's scary.  I used to joke that I was just waiting for them to say, "I hate you!  You're not my mother!"  Now that they are 13, that day seems to be inching ever closer.  I only hope that they know we've only had their best interests at heart.  I love those kids so much and am so proud of them.  I hope they realize that.


Until we know for sure, we'll just keep loving them and spoiling them with our time, because if I've learned one thing through all these frustrating moments of being a stepparent, it's that you can never spoil a child with love and time.

Spaghetti Tuesday on a Wednesday!

I'm sure you guys are getting used to me failing to write up my Tuesday 5s, right?  I know, I know, I'm falling behind.  I actually had a really good reason for it being late THIS time.  I was gone all day for work, then I took my stepdaughter to a concert.  The One Direction concert, to be exact.  How was it?  Well, that's the topic of this week's random 5, so read on...

1.  It was hot as balls last night and the concert was at an outdoor stadium.  Yeah, sitting in the sun for an hour before the opening act, then an additional hour after the opening act, only served to make us sweaty messes by the end of the evening.  Added to that, my legs and feet swell in the heat.  My toes looked like Vienna sausages and I had cankles even Hillary Clinton could make fun of!  

2.  I guess it's a thing that at every 1D (we're that close now, obvs) concert, they read the signs that people bring.  Well, all I can say is this:  Some parents didn't do a very good job at screening the things their children were writing on the signs.  LOTS of inappropriate signs that my 13-year old shook her head in disgust at were there last night, making pretty blatant references to sex and genitalia.  Thankfully, the guys looked right over those and only commented on the ones that were funny or sincere.  My SD also said that she heard Louis and Liam on their mikes during that part and even they were appalled at the crassness of some of the fans.

3.  Flip side was some great FUNNY signs, including one that said she loved the band more than Netflix.  In this day and age, that's devotion!  There were also a lot of "MARRY ME" signs.  Harry was the main one working the crowd whenever the band took a little break.  He was actually very funny, working the crowd and commenting on the signs.  

4.  The concert was actually very well done, once the band got started and I actually had heard several of the songs.  However, the shrieking...oh my, the shrieking!  I forgot my earplugs, so I endured quite a bit of it assaulting my ears.  There were girls a couple rows in front of us who were screaming and crying.  I got to live a little bit of my teenage years in that moment, because I never got to see any of my favorite bands in concert as a teen. Next time I will remember earplugs though.  Those girls can hit some high pitches.

5.  The best part?  My stepdaughter's face whenever they first walked out on stage and each subsequent time they featured Niall.  He's her favorite.  She was grinning ear to ear practically the entire concert.  Sweat and heat didn't faze her and neither did waiting so long for them to come on stage.  All that mattered was the moment she giddily clutched her new 1D tour shirt, grinned, and thanked me.  This was her first concert and as much as she enjoyed it, I'm sure it won't be her last.  As a fan of all kinds of music and especially loving going to concerts, I can't wait!!

Tuesday Random 5: Bierocks, Board Games, and Brownies, oh my!

It has been a multitude of weeks since I last posted a Tuesday 5 list.  I have been overwhelmed with summer time activities.  We have hosted a 4th of July BBQ, been gardening, cleaning house, prepping for August's fiscal fast (you'll read more about that in another post soon), reading, etc.  So, I finally decided to prioritize my blog again.  Today's Tuesday 5 is a hodgepodge of thoughts and happenings.  What have you been up to this summer?

1)  It is actually very liberating to unfriend people on Facebook.  I try not to do it much, because I try not to add individuals that I don't know fairly well, but eventually I find that I'm not getting much out of our connection and I have to cut those ties.  I also HATE advertising that I'm doing it, because it seems like such a "Look at me!" sort of statement.  I know, I know, I'm blogging about it now.  *sigh*  It's only because I want to mention how great it is to finally let go of baggage that was hurting your heart.  True friendship is more than just meaningless platitudes.  Don't friend me on Facebook or accept my friendship on Facebook if you don't want to be friends with me in real life.  Also, friendship is actions AND words.  I don't care if we haven't seen each other for years, I can still feel loved and cared for by people in the way they treat me when they do get to see me and talk with me.  I hope those people feel the same.  However, there are some individuals that love to say they have all these friends, but never put those supposed feelings into action.  I guess what really made me unfriend people this time was talking with a good guy friend in February.  I was telling him what I felt about how a group of people was treating my husband and I.  Specifically me, because well, EVERYONE loves my husband and I'm a lot tougher to like.  I know this.  I have accepted this.  It doesn't always make it less painful, but it is something I've come to terms with about myself.  Anyhow, I was telling him about all of the things that they had done, outwardly and covertly, whether it was intentional or not and he pretty much asked me why I was still friends with them.  I couldn't answer that coherently.  It stuck in my mind and my heart and I ruminated over it for weeks and months.  After a recent conversation with one of the individuals I thought was a friend and subsequent actions after that conversation, I realized I really didn't know why I was still hanging on to something they didn't care about one way or the other.  So, I let go.  You know what's really funny, too.  I unfriended this bunch a week ago and haven't heard a peep from them since.  You will know your friends by their actions and well, now I know.  It still hurts, don't get me wrong, but when it's time to let go and you finally find that courage, it is truly liberating.

Pluto?  Nope, the delicious dough!

2)  I made a bunch of frozen bierocks this past Saturday.  My intention is to prep for August and have quick and easy meals if we didn't feel like cooking.  So, I made up enough dough for 3 dozen bierocks and what I thought was enough filling for 3 dozen bierocks.  My husband and I do this in tandem.  I get the dough flattened into a circle and he does the filling and crimping.  Needless to say, the filling only made about 26 bierocks.  What to do with the other 10 lumps of dough?  Well, Rick ran to the store and picked up mozzarella and pepperoni and we made 10 "hot pockets" out of those.  I'm excited to thaw them and try them in August!  I baked half of the bierocks and all the hot pockets fully and half the bierocks I only baked halfway.  I hope this means that the ones we'll have time to bake the rest of the way will be tastier.  We'll microwave the others, more than likely, with a slightly damp paper towel around them.  The dough does turn a bit chewier, but it's still pretty tasty for a quick homemade meal.

Finished product!  Yum!

3)  I have a Little Free Library in my yard.  You can find more information about that at Little Free Library.org.  So, I keep a pen in there with a notebook for people to write questions and comments.  The first one was removed about a month or so into us having it.  I finally replaced it a couple weeks ago and it was gone again in a matter of a day or two.  I had it affixed by twine to the notebook and put a little tape around it just to keep it from sliding around.  Sure enough, they took off the tape and took the pen.  I do not understand this behavior.  Why does anyone want to take a generic 39 cent pen?  I'll put another one out there eventually.  I don't care if they need a pen, but why take it from a community resource like that?  Just come up to our door and ask for pens.  Heck, I'll go buy you several packs of them!  *smh*  Kids these days.

4)  As some of you know, Rick's Dad passed away last May of 2014.  His stepmother had to move into town from the farm, as she didn't care to live on her own in the middle of nowhere.  When we helped move some of her things, Rick ended up inheriting an old game from the 70s & 80s called "The Farming Game".  It's set up very similarly to Monopoly, but instead of buying properties, you purchase acreage for grain, hay, and orchards, as well as livestock, pasture land, and equipment.  As you get to certain areas of the board, you enter harvest season for the different types of acreage.  You then roll a die to determine how much income you netted off that harvest and what operating expenses you have to purchase are determined by drawing a card.  It is a lot of fun.  I had never heard of it before, but we played it the very next weekend with the kids.  It entertained us for FOUR hours.  Yep.  4!  I've been itching to play it again.  What are your favorite board games?

5)  Finally to the end, sorry it took so long.  I guess since I haven't posted in two months, I finally had a few interesting things to say!  So, for number 5, I'm gonna do you a solid.  Try this recipe soon.  It's for zucchini brownies and it is GOOD.  No milk.  No eggs.  Delicious!  The batter can be dry, but the zucchini adds moisture.  I have eaten several of them already!  Mmmmm.   Fudgy Zucchini Brownies (Egg, Nut & Lactose-Free)  ENJOY!

Have a great week everyone!

Tuesday 5: Body Positive Edition

I have been feeling rather dumpy lately. My legs hurt, I have gained back some weight, I hadn't worked out in 3 weeks. I just plain haven't been feeling it. Today was my first day back at the gym in 3 weeks and it took everything in me to pull into that parking lot, change clothes, fill up my water  bottle, and start my workout.  The reason for my absence?  Well, I was sick for a week, my shoulder hurt the next week, and the week after that was just laziness. I felt every bit of it today, too. That was one of my most difficult workouts,  mentally and physically.

So, in the interest of keeping myself going, here are 5 things I love about myself no matter my weight!

1.  My Eyes.  I think that I have very pretty eyes.  I have long eyelashes and my eyebrows are even and filled out.  They are thinning a bit, as everyone's does as you age, but not a lot.  They are arched perfectly over my eye.  I think my eyes are expressive, too.  You can usually see a lot within them.  

2.  I am tall.  I am 5'10" and I love being this height.  I can reach pretty much anything I may need from higher shelves and I carry my weight well.  Plus, it comes in handy if you are feeling confident, because sometimes with my height and weight, I intimidate people.  I'm not saying I like intimidating everyone, but it definitely has its perks in certain situations.  I can help people at the grocery store, too.  My favorite part of being tall is being super tall in high heels.  I'm lucky my husband is 6'2", so even in heels, he's still usually taller than I am.  

3.  I have great hair.  It's naturally wavy, thick, and glossy.  I rarely use product in my hair and I don't often color it or use heat on it.  That keeps it looking very shiny and healthy.  It's wavy enough that I can diffuse it into curls or straighten it fairly easily.  I just got a bunch of blonde highlights in it and chopped it for the summer and it looks great!  I also look good with longer hair, though I don't keep it long very much anymore.  I am definitely getting some grays, but they actually blend in pretty well.  

4.  I have a lot of scars that remind me that I'm a survivor.  I have scars from open and closed heart surgeries, my pacemaker surgery, and scars where they put tubes in my stomach as a baby.  I have scars on my hands from burns and cuts and scars from a bike wreck when I was in 5th grade.  They define me in a way that nothing else can.  They show that I have lived and been hurt and gotten up and dusted myself off and kept going.  As a child, I was asked a lot about my zipper on my chest and I never remember feeling bad about it.  I was proud.  It made me different.  It made me feel strong.

5.  I like my brain.  There are a lot of things about it that drive me crazy, like its need to obsess over little things and the endless counting of ALL THE THINGS, but it stores quite a bit of information.  My brothers tease me that I'm only 'trivia smart' and while I agree that I know a lot of useless knowledge, I know that I'm not stupid.  I pick directions and hobbies up very quickly.  Once you show me something, I don't usually have to ask how to do it again.  I have phone numbers stored in my brain from YEARS ago.  (I still know all my good friends' phone numbers from when we were kids as well as my library card number from my hometown library.)  I still know Mark Antony's soliloquy from Julius Caesar and I have a vast inventory of 90s songs, titles and artists, in my brain.  I have pretty good critical thinking skills and great short-term memory.  (That was helpful in high school for a lot of tests in which I studied 20 minutes ahead of time and passed the test with flying colors.)  My brain is big and beautiful, just like me.

I'm sure this random 5 was boring to a lot of you and may seem braggy, but I truly believe positive self-talk is crucial in making things happen.  I don't like feeling down and dumpy and with my anxiety, sometimes I feel like I have no choice.  Today, though?  Today I have a choice and my big, beautiful brain is telling me that I have a lot of good things going on.  I will chip away at the weight gain, little by little, and I will conquer more major steps in my journey.  I hope all of you take the time to be body positive today, too.  There's lots to love about all of us, so come on, tell me your best feature below!

Tuesday Random 5: Supper Time

1. Lasagna and garlic bread for supper with homemade meat sauce. I let it cook for an hour, not an hour and a half like the recipe said, because otherwise,  we wouldn't be eating until after 7! OMG on the sauce, though. New recipe and it is ridiculous! So yummy! The secret? Sweet Italian sausage and ground beef!

2. Due to the sauce and complexity of the recipe, I did not make real garlic bread. Womp. Womp. The Texas Toast 5 cheese stuff is a decent substitute though.

3. I made polenta for the first time last week. It was super easy! It was also really good and has a texture similar to grits, which I love! I will definitely make it more often now.

4.  I just checked on the lasagna and bread. (They are still in the oven.) I snuck another spoonful of leftover sauce. That's some life-changing sauce!

5. I think it's a perfect night for lasagna.  It is gray and rainy here. What's your favorite meal to make on a rainy Spring night?

Have a great week everyone!

Tuesday Random 5: Gardening Edition

Do you know what I like about gardening?  Getting dirty.  I love coming inside and having mud-caked shoes and feet, dirt under my nails and my outfit covered in dirt.  Gardening is elemental and practically a spiritual exercise.  With that thought, here is my garden edition of the random 5!

1.  I planted a butterfly garden tonight...all by myself.  Meaning that I dug the hole, 4 ft. long by 1 1/2 ft. wide, placed all the individual plants and backfilled and watered it.  We are doing what we can to help save the monarchs.  They apparently only lay their larvae on milkweed, so we have some red milkweed.  I paired it with ornamental grass on either side and some gaura in the middle.  It looks great, but my back is sooooore.

2.  Things are blooming!  My mandevilla is going strong and my Kansas peonies are blooming.  They are a beautiful dark fuchsia and smell great.

3.  If you have a dog, you probably already know this, but BEWARE the land mines!  Ugh.  They are everywhere and stink so badly.  I love my dog, but his poop is a different story.

4.  Buying from an actual nursery is expensive, but usually well worth the time and money!  Our local nursery was great about recommending plants to pair together in containers and had so much variety of everything.  You can't find quite the same stuff at Home Depot or Lowe's garden centers.  You also have a hard time finding help at those places...at least I do!  Bonus:  My nursery loaded pretty much everything for me!

5.  One of the best feelings in the world is wiping off your brow, leaning on the shovel handle, popping the tab on a fresh beer, and surveying your handiwork.  It's a delight to know that I can help things grow through some hard work and great plant choices.

Now that I'm done with the butterfly garden, I have my sight set on some cascading plants to fill the trough my husband built and hung on the inside of the fence next to our new patio.  Any gardeners out there with colorful and low maintenance selections?

Have a great week everyone!

Tuesday again?

I am sure you probably haven't missed me, but just in case you have, I'm sorry for my absence. I am feeling a little overwhelmed lately. I am valiantly trying to stick with my workouts, but I have gotten a bit behind.  Then, I have been terrible lately at meal planning and have gained back 10 pounds in 2 weeks. Ouch. I am lethargic and busy and feel like I am letting my husband down a lot lately. Of course, being super behind on the blog doesn't help any either. I suck today. Here's my pity party. Bring wine!

1.  I nearly fell asleep driving home after my workout yesterday. I was stopped at a light close to home, yawning and trying to keep my eyes ooen. Then, LMFAO's Party Rock Anthem came on the radio and suddenly, I was awake! Jammin' out and cranking it up.

2.  We moved into a new office building downtown.  It is a block away from a camera/electronics store. I am already eyeing the filters. So many to choose from!

3.  My feet are already starting to develop athlete's foot. Ugh. Anyone have some good alternative remedies?

4. I am thinking of chopping my hair. Not sure about it. I like my long hair, but I never have time to do anything cute with it. I am not sure my fat face will look good with shorter hair.

5.  My tummy is grumbling and I am trying to drink water to get it to shut up. I cannot eat a sleeve of Thin Mints. I must avoid do much sugar, but it is so difficult.  How do you get your tummy to shut up when you are craving goodies?

Tuesday 5

1.  I started trying to put in an effort this week and actually wake up at my first alarm to get ready for the day.  Previously, I was hitting snooze 5 times and then rolling over and picking up my tablet to check Facebook and not crawling out of bed until I absolutely had no time left but to pack a quick lunch, change, and run out the door.  Today I received the first obligatory, "You look really nice today.  Is there a change?"  Yep, I'm actually wearing makeup, that's the difference.  Apparently I look like an old hag without it.

2.  I found out that I have anemia today.  My hemoglobin has always been lower than normal and I have a very difficult time giving blood because of it.  However, I've never actually been diagnosed with anemia before.  Apparently, I now have a logical reason as to why I chew ice all day long at work.

3.  I took a shopping trip to Target today.  I actually walked out with only $40 worth of stuff.  I'm amazed.  You don't have any idea how many things I picked up and put back though.  My restraint should be rewarded...with a purse!  Oh, wait...

4.  I bought myself a T-shirt the other day to support my Boys in Blue, the Kansas City Royals.  I've had a Royals shirt, but needed another, as the one I had has what I believe to be cherry juice stains on it.  I got a plain tee with Royals on the front and Eric Hosmer's last name and number (35) on the back.  He's a rockstar and he really grew on me during the playoffs last season.  He has a lot of passion and gets fired up.  He's also extremely supportive of his teammates.  I was looking up last year's roster for someone yesterday and saw that we also have something in common.  Hosmer is a Scorpio, just like myself.  Awesome!

5.  My husband finished up building our raised gardens.  We are hoping to plant everything by the end of this weekend.  I am excited to get it started, but I think we bit off a bit more than we should have this year.  Either way, I'm hoping to enjoy a lot of fresh produce this summer!  I'll have to take pictures of it when it's completed.

Have a great week everyone!

Tuesday Random 5: Post-Easter edition

I know it has been a while since I posted regularly, but I have been very lazy and disaffected lately. I really am behind on everything and just need a major restart.  I am hoping writing this will help in dome small way to get me back on track.  Here goes!

1. The Easter hangover began Sunday evening.  We visited my parents and stayed up far too late both Friday and Saturday. We played some cards, watched Kentucky lose (Haha), and I actually got a bit of crocheting accomplished.  Sunday evening we were up too late doing laundry for the new week. We had a blast but I was certainly feeling grumpy Sunday night. 

2. I started reading Steve Martin's autobiography,  Born Standing Up. It is a great read so far and it is amazing how he started out! One of my all time favorite comedians.

3. We went to Easter mass at a gorgeous old church known for its frescoes and statuary. It was an amazing place to celebrate the resurrection of Jesus. When I was a child, the pieta there brought me to tears.  It scared me and fascinated me. Very similar to how I feel when I think about things beyond this world.

4. Have you heard? The brontosaurus is back! Scientists now believe that the apatosaurus and brontosaurus are two distinct species. This may not seem like a big deal, but it is just as historic as if they finally reinstated Pluto back to regular planet status.

5. Currently on my nightstand: The aforementioned Steve Martin book, Rachel Dratch's book, Girl walks into a Bar, Henri Nouwen's The Return of the Prodigal Son, my Kindle fire, my mouth guard to keep from snoring, baby blanket crochet pattern, a large volume of Twentieth Century American Poetry, a notebook,  a Bible,  my prayer book, 33 Days to morning Glory (a DIY Marian retreat), and a copy of Matthew Kelly's Rediscover Catholicism.  Phew! That's a lot of stuff. How many books are stacked up on your nightstand? Anything good?

Tuesday 5 is Alive!

1.  I just got home from my stepson's musical on the Nifty Fifties.  It's so cute to see 7th and 8th graders in a play.  Most of them are brand new to it and they all have so much enthusiasm.  My stepson played a nerd, with taped up glasses, sweater vest, and a bowtie.  Too cute!  I was in our school's play (we only did one a year) when I was in high school, but never got more than bit parts.  They dulled my sparkle, y'all!  Nah, not really.  I still had a blast and I have lots of pictures from most of the shows.  Imagine that, me, the middle child, seeking attention through acting.  I still dance wherever I am and usually sing, hum, or whistle, too.

2.  My Mom and Dad came down on Saturday to hang out with us for a while.  They needed to do a little shopping, so we tagged along.  We had to make the obligatory stop at Sam's Club.  Free samples galore on Saturdays.  Score!  I always have fun going shopping with my parents.  I feel like a kid again, tagging along and just chatting with them about everything.  My Mom and Dad are pretty funny, too.  We have a lot of comedians in my family.  We are a pretty sarcastic family, so any smartassery I learned, I came by it naturally, as did all of my siblings.

3.  Speaking of sarcasm, I actually had a boyfriend tell me once that I was too sarcastic.  C'est moi?!  Too sarcastic?  Ha.  I thought up until that point that he had a sense of humor.  Clearly not as refined as mine.

4.  Some of my favorite jokes are based in puns.  I love me some corny jokes.  The knee slappers, the guffawers, those are my faves.  My husband was listening to a podcast about movies and they were discussing Jaws and he thought of me because they started telling shark jokes.  What's a shark's favorite sammich?  Peanut butter and jellyfish of course!  The Laffy Taffy jokes?  Those are my favorites.  See above where I reference my 'refined sense of humor'.  I actually quite enjoy British humor as well.  Monty Python, Fawlty Towers, and AbFab are some of my favorites.

5.  I found out a cool thing about my county extension office a few weeks ago.  They give out a voucher for a free compost bin!  I picked mine up today.  It is one that will hold up to 216 gallons of stuff.  I can't believe they give them away.  That's awesome!  I cannot wait to get mine started.  We already only put our trash out once every few weeks, due to the recycling program in the county.  Now we will have even less.  How cool is that?

Have a great week everyone and don't forget to 'like' my Facebook page.  I currently have a contest going on to win a pair of books!  Bonzai Book Bonanza will go on for another 10 days, so be sure to like and share my page and complete an entry form for your chance to win!

Tuesday Random 5-by!

1.  This is how I feel right now:

No, I don't feel like Jim Harbaugh, but I understand his pain.  Ever since I started eating healthier and really limiting my carbs, my craving for all sugary carby deliciousness starts clamoring every once in a while.  Today is one of those once in a whiles.  Oh, to have a moist white cake with a yummy coconut buttercream!  Mmmmm.

2.  I finished "Yes Please" by Amy Poehler this week and started "The Betrothed" by Alessandro Manzoni.  "Yes Please" was funny most of the time, but sometimes felt a little forced.  I liked most of it, but some of it really felt like she was either pandering, or really trying to distance herself from her audience.  I gave it 4 stars (out of 5) because it was a quick and easy read and was funny more often that not.  "The Betrothed" has already piqued my interest and I am excited to delve further.  I have added a couple more to my list.  Steve Martin's "Born Standing Up:  A Comic's Life" and "The Return of the Prodigal Son" by Henri Nouwen.  See a theme here?  I just hope Steve Martin doesn't disappoint me.  

3.  Here's a good debatable question:  What is the best animated series from the 90s?  I would say either Rugrats, Animaniacs, or Tiny Toon Adventures.  There is an argument to be made for Hey Arnold as well.  I have to say another of my favorites, but short-lived series, was Rocko's Modern Life.  What about you?

4.  Yesterday was Dr. Seuss's birthday.  He was a great writer and really changed the landscape of children's books forever.  My favorite of his is "If I Ran the Zoo".  Our local library had a vinyl album with a recording of that on one side and another on the other.  I don't remember what was on the other side, but I remember checking the book out with it and listening to it and following along over and over again.  I probably borrowed that from the library 50 times as a kid.  What's your favorite Dr. Seuss book?

5.  I have been crocheting like mad lately.  When you get into a rhythm, it is so relaxing.  I am probably a third of the way done with my current project.  I'm so excited to see what it will look like finished.  It's a gift and I can't wait to give it.  I'm so excited!

P.S.--My husband would like to point out that I am a big dork, because I was super duper, triple deluxe excited that I thought of, and am using, the title of this post!  I was positively giddy.  If loving puns makes me a dork then I am happy to carry that banner!!  Come join me on the...

Have a great week everyone!